Blown

Jonathan Papelbon just blew a save. He gave up hits. HITS! There was a cheap 2-run HR. Even a walk. I can't believe what I just saw. It totally wasn't Jonathan's fault, however. Sure, when he entered in the 9th to get the final three outs, the Sox led 4-2. When the top of the 9th was over, the game was tied 4-4. Yes, he pitched the whole inning and gave up both runs. But there were extenuating circumstances. He had equipment problems with his athletic supporter, which adversely affected his velocity and control. There was a guy in the stands, between home plate and 3rd base, sporting a hideously bright orangey neon hat. That questionable attire choice was affecting Jonathan's ability to see the signs, and the plate. Only a pitcher of his caliber could overcome these obstacles to even get out of that inning with a tied game.

As Jonathan sat in the dugout, with his emotions running the gamut from despondence to intense rage, we both struggled on the steps to acceptance. I empathized with him as he slammed a water bottle and, later, his glove, against the ground. He raged in the dugout, frustrated at himself for being only 99.99999% perfect. I raged at the fans, as many of them smiled and chatted in the stands. "THIS IS NOT A JOVIAL TIME! THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS!",I shouted at my TV. Brendan Donnelly came on in the 10th, and blew the tie. He can see the future with his glasses, but that knowledge did not help him avoid his destiny.

As the Sox batted in the bottom of the 10th, some of the fans were still enjoying their time at the ballpark, yapping on their damn cell phones. But others, like me, were intensely focused on the game, still hopeful of a Sox victory. The Sox failed to score, however, with the game ending on a long fly off the bat of Kevin Youkilis that died just short of The Monster. A little duck tail-sized piece of Jonathan Robert Papelbon may have died tonight also. As well as the dream of a 0.00 season ERA.

I'd like to drive down to the ballpark right now to cheer up poor Paps. I'd let him vent for awhile, then we'd play a game or two of Yahtzee. That always makes him feel better after a blown save. Or it did that one other time he had a blown save. But I am still banned from the Sox clubhouse. Even though nothing was ever proven. So, I'll just have to hope he is OK.

(Note: The following paragraph is where an ignorant blogger prattles on, clearly demonstrating his stupidity. You can go ahead and skip it, if you wish. Thanks for the heads up, Beth.)

Curt Schilling pitched well tonight, allowing only two runs over seven innings. His ERA is now a spiffy 3.15. But there is a concern that needs to be addressed. CURTIS MONTAGUE. Was it really necessary to write a comment on your shoe, referencing last week's "Sock-gate?" Let it go, Curt. Everyone knows it was blood. You got the last word on your blog. (Probably the last 1500 words, actually.) Just move along. You're a tremendous pitcher, and a prolific blogger, but this kind of crap just detracts from your rep and your Wikipedia page. Quit it.

Don Orsillo made a fashion faux pas of a serious nature with his clothing selections, and Jerry Remy let him have it. The Remdawg inquired as to whether Don had been shopping off the clearance rack, let Don know that he was "ready for Ft. Lauderdale", and asked him when his "shuffleboard time" was. Good stuff. Tina Cervasio should have gotten Neon Hat Guy to weigh in with his views on that topic. Alas, she did not. Just another reason Amalie Benjamin should be handling that role.

Finally, a Sox Ball Dude played a ball that was in fair territory, gifting the Athletics with a ground-rule double. Later, a foul ball went down the LF line, where a new Sox Ball Dudette opted not to play the ball. She even refrained from retrieving the ball, forcing the 3B umpire to go down and get it. (Manny was on nap time at that point, apparently.) She seemed fearful of being involved with the ball in any manner. Perhaps she didn't want to share the same fate as the Ball Dude who preceded her. But what was his fate? Was he released into the Fens to fare for himself? Is he hanging in effigy from the Green Monster right now, alongside Neon Hat Guy? We may never know. (Well, unless good ol' Amalie blogs about it.)